How to Create (and Keep Alive) a Reward Economy That Works
Sticker charts. Token jars. Marble systems. Screen time minutes. If you haven’t tried a reward system yourself, you’ve definitely heard of them. You’ve probably also seen these systems lose steam fast: they work for a few days, then collapse into forgotten chore charts and power struggles.
So what actually makes a reward system work?
In this post, I’ll walk you through how to create a reward economy that is grounded in evidence-based behavior change practices and realistic for busy families to maintain.
Why Use a Reward System in the First Place?
Kids are more likely to repeat behaviors that are followed by positive consequences.
Just like adults work harder when they’re recognized or paid, kids respond to incentives. When used well, reward systems help kids develop habits, routines, and internal motivation over time.
Step 1: Decide on 1-2 behaviors you would like to decrease
Start by choosing just one or two behaviors you want to decrease and describing them as specifically as possible (e.g., running away with the tablet when dad says that screen time is over).
Be sure to consider whether a reward economy is the right tool for this behavior. Reward charts work best for skills or habits your child can learn and practice with support, like following a morning routine or completing homework. For behaviors tied to attention-seeking or testing limits (tantrums or yelling) strategies like active ignoring or consistent discipline might be more effective.
Step 2: Decide on the positive opposite behavior you would like to increase
Next, identify the positive opposite behavior: what exactly would you like your child to do instead?
Describe the positive opposite behavior in a way that is specific, observable and measurable so there is no question about whether the behavior did or did not happen. Phrase the positive opposite behavior positively so that your child knows what to do rather than what not to do.
“Calmly and gently return tablet to dad at the end of screen time”
Also consider whether your child will need help or prompting to do this behavior at first. If so, include that in your goal (e.g., “Calmly and gently return tablet to dad at the end of screen time with no more than one reminder”). Remember, support can be gradually reduced as your child gains confidence and mastery.
Step 3: Get the logistics down
Pick something your child can earn and accumulate (tokens, stickers, points) that works for your family. The only rule is that it must be tangible and countable so that your child can see their progress build over time.
Decide on a place to keep your chart (or whatever you are using) that makes sense given your family’s routine and goals. For example, if you are working on bathroom habits, it would make sense to keep your chart, tokens, stickers, etc. in the bathroom.
Step 4: Loop in your child
A reward economy is much more effective when your child understands what’s expected and feels like an active participant in the process. Discuss the following together:
- What behavior(s) you’re working on together
Use clear, simple language to describe the specific positive behavior (e.g., “We’re going to work on putting your backpack by the door in the morning”). - How the behavior will be tracked
Will you use stickers, tokens, points, or check marks? Show them the chart or tracking system and walk through how it works. - When the behavior will be tracked
Let your child know when you’ll check in about the behavior. This could be at the end of each routine (e.g., bedtime), after school, or at the end of the day. - Explain the reward system and determine appropriate rewards together
More on this below. - How they can earn tokens (and how they won’t)
Be clear and consistent: “You earn a star each time you calmly and gently return to tablet to dad at the end of screen time when he asks you for it. If you don’t, no star, but you’ll have another chance tomorrow.” - Practice the system together. Let your child try earning a token for a practice behavior so they experience how it works before it really “counts.”
Step 5: Decide on rewards
For a reward economy to be effective, it’s essential to include immediate, consistent feedback as well as meaningful rewards your child can work toward.
Effective systems include a mix of:
- Immediate reinforcement: As soon as your child shows the positive opposite behavior, respond immediately with both labeled praise and the token or sticker. This moment of connection reinforces the behavior emotionally (through praise) and structurally (through tokens), making it much more likely to happen again.
- A reward menu with short- and long-term options: To maintain motivation over time, create a menu that includes both daily and long-term rewards.
- To do this, first think about what your child’s daily point goal will be. Let’s say they can earn one star per day for tidying up the playroom with less than one reminder. You would expect them to earn about 5 points in a week, 10 points over the course of two weeks, etc.
- Create a reward menu, which should include:
- Daily short-term rewards (low effort privileges that you would feel comfortable offering most days)
- Example: If you earn one sticker in a day, you can choose: 10 minutes of extra screen time, an extra bedtime story, 15 minutes later bedtime, etc.
- Longer term rewards are bigger ticket items that children can work towards over time with consistent engagement in the desired behavior. I like to create four sections, which roughly equate to rewards that you would be comfortable delivering every week, every two weeks, every three weeks, or every four weeks depending on how many points you would expect your child to earn in one week.
- Using the example above, I would have a 5 point section (weekly), 10 point section (biweekly), 15 point section (every three weeks) and 20 point section (monthly), with the value of rewards increasing as the point value increases.
- Choose a consistent weekly “cash out” time, like Friday afternoons, when your child can decide whether to redeem their points or save up towards a bigger reward.
- Daily short-term rewards (low effort privileges that you would feel comfortable offering most days)
Step 6: Reinforce early and often
When you’re first teaching a new behavior, kids need frequent, predictable reinforcement.
- Reward immediatelyafter the behavior whenever possible
- Catch them being successful, even partially
Once the behavior becomes more routine, you can shift to intermittent reinforcement (rewarding less frequently but still consistently enough to maintain motivation).
Step 7: Troubleshoot and Adjust
Every reward system will need tweaks over time. Common issues and solutions:
- The novelty wears off. Switch up the rewards. Add new ones, raise the stakes, or offer surprise “jackpots.”
- Your child stops caring. Involve them in picking rewards that are actually motivating to them.
- It becomes a power struggle. Make sure rewards are still given consistently and without criticism. Keep it upbeat, not punitive.
- You forget to keep it going. Keep the system as simple as possible so it fits in to your family’s life. Set a reminder. Post the reward menu where you’ll see it. Tie it to a routine time (e.g., before bedtime or after school).
The Goal: Skill Building, Not Perfection
Reward systems aren’t about raising “perfectly behaved” kids. They’re about giving children clear expectations, positive feedback, and a pathway to success.
Eventually, as the behavior becomes a habit, you can add new target behaviors to reinforce.
Caroline Swetlitz, PhD, Postdoctoral Fellow, Anxiety Specialists of Atlanta. Dr. Swetlitz She specializes in the treatment of anxiety disorders in children, adolescents and young adults using evidence-based techniques grounded in CBT, DBT-C, and PCIT. Dr. Swetlitz also provides parent behavioral management training to address disruptive behaviors in children. She especially enjoys collaborating closely with parents/caregivers and leveraging the parent-child relationship to support progress towards treatment goals.
